we just returned home from sin city. that place is as depressing as it is fun!
things we did include:
dinner at midnight, more than once.
gambling.
went to hoover dam (leaning over the edge is freaky!!!).


















our first real las vegas show (it was called the jubilee, but we refer to it as the boobilee).


















visited the con expo.












ate in the eiffel tower. went to the top of the eiffel tower.










































visited new york city.
almost died in the cab ride from the airport.
almost died when the plane landed on the way home-scary!!!
saw almost all the casino/hotels.
rode a gondola around venice.

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement,
job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.

NAME_____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________

HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA_____________

SOCIAL SECURITY #_________________ DRIVERS LICENSE #________________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES________________

HOME ADDRESS_______________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______

Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No
If No, explain: _____________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________

Number of years they have been married ______________________________

If less than your age, explain
____________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________


ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No

B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No

C. A waterbed? __Yes __No

D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No

E. A tattoo? __Yes __No

F. Do you have an earring, nose ring,
pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring? __Yes __No

(IF YOU ANSWERED 'YES' TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION
AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)


ESSAY SECTION:

In 50 words or less, what does 'LATE' mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does 'DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER' mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does 'ABSTINENCE' mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________


REFERENCES SECTION:

Church you attend ___________________________________________________

How often you attend ________________________________________________

When would be the best time to interview your:

father? _____________

mother? _____________

pastor? _____________


SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers
are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:

______________________________________________________________

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:

______________________________________________________________

C: A woman's place is in the:

_________________________________________________________

D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:

______________________________________________________________

E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? ___________________________

F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:

______________________________________________________________

F. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? __________________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO
THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT,
NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE
WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.


_________________________________________________________
Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)


_______________________________ ________________________________
Mother's Signature Father's Signature

_______________________________ ________________________________
Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman

Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual.
Please allow four to six years for processing.

You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. P leas e do not try to call or write (since
you probably can't, and it would cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be
notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases. (you might watch your back)

To prepare yourself, start studying Daddy's Rules for Dating.

Daddy's Rules for Dating
Your dad's rules for your boyfriend (or for you if you're a guy) :

Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them..

Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place t o your waist.

Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a 'Barrier method' of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five:
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is: 'early.'

Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge . Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual themes are to be avoided; movies which feature chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine:
Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi . When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

the other night my husband took me for ice cream and on the way there he played me this song and told me it was his song about me.


She keeps the secrets in her eyes
She wraps the truth inside her lies
Just when I can't take what she's done to me
She comes to me
And leads me back to paradise

She's so hard to hold
But I can't let go

I'm a house of cards in a hurricane
A reckless ride in the pouring rain
She cuts me and the pain is all I wanna feel
She danced away just like a child
She drives me crazy, drives me wild
But I'm helpless when she smiles

Maybe I'd fight it if I could
It hurts so bad, but feels so good
She opens up just like a rose to me
When she's close to me
Anything she asked me to, I would

It's out of control
But I can't let it go

I'm a house of cards in a hurricane
A reckless ride in the pouring rain
She cuts me and the pain is all I wanna feel
She danced away just like a child
She drives me crazy, drives me wild
But I'm helpless when she smiles

When she looks at me
I get so weak

1. Do you own uggs?
no i do not.

2. How did you do on the last test you took?
i guess that would be in college and i made an a.

3. Who was the last person you hugged?
my daughter

4. What are you most looking forward to?
spending next week with jon, & then vegas.

5. Do you wear Hollister?
use to. i'm to fat now =) and i'm still really skinny!

6. What food makes you sick?
anything that smells really strong and i'm not craving it. welcome to pregnant life.

7. Do you get shy around the guy/girl you like?
we've been married for three years and he's seen my give birth, i think we're good.

8. Do you remember what you were like a year ago?
not pregnant, so really skinny.

9. Who was your last text from?
lynn

10. When was the last time you saw this person?
monday night

11. When was the last time you got butterflies?
when we had the ultrasound to find out what the baby was.

14. Do you have pictures of you with your friends?
definitely.

15. Where are you right now?
h.o.m.e

16. Do you give special ringtones to certain people?
umhum.

17. What's the weather like outside?
really cold. and windy.

18. What are you listening to?
the disney channel

19. What is your favorite holiday?
halloween

20. Where'd you get everything that you're wearing?
okay..
1. old navy flipflops.
2. pj pants from target
3. maternity undies from motherhood
4. ga t-shirt from goodwill
5. hoodie that says "kurt-nee"

21. Do you text with T9 or ABC?
T9

22. Have you memorized your social security number?
when i was in highschool i had to

23. Have you ever had a dream about people you love dying?
only once

24. Do you get along with you parents?
they are my best friends.

25. Do you like water?
love it

26. Do you have a pet in the room with you?
in the floor next to me

27. When is the next time you'll see the person you like?
tonight

28. If you died today, would there be anything you wish you could've said?
nope

29. Are you on YouTube?
i dont think so.

30. What was the last book you read?
all the way? i can't remember i'm reading pillars of the earth right now

31. Are your nails painted right now?
nope.

32. When is your birthday?
march

33.What would your parents do if they caught you drinking?
i'm almost 23 years old i drink in front of my parents all the time.

34. What was the last food you ate?
muffin.

35. What's the last food you ate that was salted?
mashpotatos.

36. What are you watching?
the computer screen

37. Do you talk to people on the phone or IM more?
phone.

38. What type of cell service do you have?
t-mobile

39. What color are your eyes?
hazel

40. Do you have your ears pierced?
yes. three times.

41. Would you ever pierce your own belly button?
no, i have people that do that for me.

42. Do you want any more piercings?
i want my lip on the side but my husband says thats trashy, but i can get a stud in the middle.

43. Have your friends seen you cry?
yes. and a few strangers!

44. Who was the last person you cried in front of?
my daughter. i cry at the publix commercials.

46. Are you annoyed with anyone right now? Who?
nope.

47. Have you ever had a panic attack?
nope

48. Name the last time you got really bored?
everyday

49. Who is the last person you talked with MySpace Messaging?
my cousin

i feel like i'm in a place of waiting.

waiting on rileigh mostly, and i would not rush this pregnancy for anything in the world because it's the last time i plan on being pregnant, and i'm just enjoying taylor-marie, but for the last few years i feel like something huge is just around the corner. it might be that i've always felt like we were incomplete because i knew we were going to have another baby and now that we are so close it's really exciting, but i know there is alot of hard work ahead and that makes me feel overwhelmed already!

it's amazing to think i will be 23 with two children. i realized this morning though that my children should not define who i am. they are a deep layer of me, but not solely me.

i also am so behind on my God relationship. i think that has a lot to do with this restlessness that is taking me over. it's just so hard to get into a good habit. bad ones seem to slip seamlessly into my life while the things i should do get pushed to the side. i just need some mental & physical energy!!!

i like the way this was done. i vote republican but i thought this was neat.

i am in the best mood ever because me & my best went to the huge kids consignment sale, and totally racked up!!! i only spend $140 but came home with well over $600 worth! i got the swing i wanted which at target is $130 but i only paid $50!!! and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it! i got taylor-marie some dr.seuss books-brand new $2 each!!! you can not beat that! the only down side to the day was the four hours we stood in line to check out!!! it was so nice though to buy taylor-marie some high end clothes-she got three baby gap outfits-and not go broke!!! i don't even go in baby gap because it is so high! rileigh also got a few outfits, a toy (which her big sister has claimed), and a crib bumper! my husband was not very impressed but i don't think he really gets it!