lake lanier

wednesday- august 6th, 2008

i never have time to myself anymore, much less time to blog. having a two year old and newborn is exhausting! most days my body feels like a big pile of jello! we staying at the lake this week in my husbands camper so i actually have to relax! although i have to admit trying to cook dinner in a fifth wheel camper with two crying kids right up under you is not fun! we going out to eat tonight so i don’t beat myself senseless!

i’m reading this book right now during my “free” time called “skinny bitch”, it’s absolutely fascinating! the book is written by two vegans and i must say if you had told me before reading this book that i would one day agree to stop eating meat, and avoid dairy whenever possible i would have said you were crazy!!! i don’t know why i’m surprised that the federal government doesn’t give two shits about my health. everyone should look into what happens to the animals you eat on a regular basis and the stress it puts on your body! animals pumped full of antibiotics and growth hormones=serious health issues!

thursday-august 7th, 2008

the baby slept 6 hours and 45 mins straight last night!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i had a hard time falling back asleep after i feed her because i was really awake from so much sleep! i’m happy as a lark!

friday-august 8th, 2008

the baby did not sleep at all last night!!!! it wasn’t that bad but i was extremely disappointed that she didn’t keep with the sleeping long stretches!

my mom worked me out today on her palates machine (she’s a personal trainer) and then i had my first tofu taco and it was amazing!!!! i actually enjoyed it more than chicken which i usually get! it was such a relief to finally eat something that i enjoy and that filled me up! i’m been starving since i went on this no meat diet!

diary is just as fattening and bad for you as non-organic/not all natural meat but way harder to avoid in public, and since we’re staying in the camper and eating out a lot i’m not pushing it with the dairy. except when it comes to taylor-marie who is lactose and tolerate.

saturday-august 9th, 2008

stop eating meat and you will poop like a well oiled machine! it’s crazy how much i go now! but it’s like, “wow, i feel healthier and cleaner than ever!” the only annoying thing about this process is my husband who thinks i’m crazy. he is usually my number one supporter even when he thinks i’m going a little overboard with something but with no meat thing he said your on you own! i’m still eating fish once a week (because i’m breast-feeding it’s not recommend that you eat a lot of fish due to mercury contents). he does agree that they use to many hormones to grow chickens! they grow a chicken from hatchling to full grown on it’s way to the slaughter house in six weeks!!!!!! that is not normal nor can it be healthy to eat.

we’re taking the girl to the water park today and i am not excited about the idea of being in a bathing-suit six weeks after giving birth and eighteen pound over my pre-pregnancy weight! i bought a one piece at target last night. i’ve never worn a one piece in my life! and i can decide if i want to keep it and wear it or just wear a two piece with my cover up all day. i’m thinking the cover up is just going to get annoying so i might as well suck it up with the one piece.

ohhhhhhhhhhhh we went to the mall of ga last night after an AMAZING dinner at bonefish grill (i love that place), then me and my huband both got new nikes. he got these tight golf shoes, and i got this awesome pair red trainer shoes. they are extremely comfortable, but annoying in the sense that now all my exercise clothes are going to the have to be red, black, or white because i can’t stand to not match if i’m going to be wear working out clothes in public! and why would i be wear work out clothes in public? because with a breast-feeding baby there is no time to think about taking a shower and changing clothes after you work out! the plan in to work out at least five days a week until i’m back at the weight i want to be. but i don’t want to just be skinny i want to be toned. seriously i can not stand the way my body looks right not, and yet i just keep eating whatever i want! it will be nice once the weight is gone and i’m exercising and i can eat whatever i want! i’ve got to make me some fun workout play list! i’m thinking i’ll be stealing my dad’s nano that i have him for christmas like 2 years ago to wear when i’m walking. i wish we lived closer to a track where i could push the girls in the stroller. the neighborhood across the street from us creeps me out!

we’re in the process of putting our house on the market. we’re taking it slow because my wonderful mother-in-law is living with us right now but found herself a house to rent right down the road. i’m going to miss her because she keeps the dishes washed, house picked up, and laundry done for me! it’s been so nice with the new baby not to have to worry about that stuff! we want to move to the next county over where we can send our girls to public school and not feel like we’re sending them off to be educated in the world of sex, drugs, and gangs. some people think i’m being crazy but i’m not. i want to be the one to teach my girls about those things, not their peers.

"you have to give her a tata"

last night my sister was over for dinner. i was in the kitchen making cookies (with the mixer) and had put ryleigh (my month old daughter) in her bed for a nap. after a little while taylor-marie decided that corey needed to take her upstairs to play. when the girls got upstairs ryleigh woke up and began to cry so corey went in and picked her up. while she was getting the baby corey began to explain to taylor-marie that the baby was crying to which taylor-marie replied, "you have to give her a tata" and pointed to her boobs. corey said, "that's your momma's job."

i dont trust myself (with loving you)

No, I’m not the man I used to be lately
See, you met me at an interesting time
And if my past is any sign of your future
You should be warned before I let you inside
Hold on to whatever you find, baby
Hold on to whatever will get you through
Hold on to whatever you find, baby
I don’t trust myself with loving you
I will beg my way into your garden
And then I’ll break my way out when it rains
Just to get back to the place where I started
So I can want you back all over again
(I don’t really understand)
Hold on to whatever you find, baby
Hold on to whatever will get you through
Hold on to whatever you find, baby
I don’t trust myself with loving you
Who do you love?
Girl I see through your love
Who do you love?
Me or the thought of me?
Hold on to whatever you find, baby
Hold on to whatever will get you through
Hold on to whatever you find, baby
I don’t trust myself with loving you

my soul is torn.

apologies

reflections on time gone by

"Up to a point a man's life is shaped by environment, heredity, and the movements and changes in the world around him. Then there comes a time when it lies within his grasp to shape the clay of his life into the sort of thing he wishes to be. Only the weak blame parents, their race, their times, lack of good fortune, or the quirks of fate. Everyone has it within his power to say, 'This I am today; that I will be tomorrow.' The wish, however, must be implemented by deeds."
-Louis L'Amour

when i was 18 years old i was full of reckless abandon. no one could tell me anything because i knew it all, and my way was best. looking back now i was extremely ignorant in the ways of life and the world. i attended college in tenn. for one year where i discovered everything i loved and loathed about myself. after returning home to ga i fell in love with & married the man that is truly my best friend, worst enemy, ally in all things good & bad, father to my children, provider to my family, sounding board, critic, life coach & lover.

when i was about six months pregnant with my daughter i suddenly realized i was about to be responsible for another human being. it became clear to me that it was now my God appointed task to raise this child in way of the Lord. He had chosen me out of all the women in the world to have this particular little girl. and there i was much calmer than i had been two years before, but still hanging onto that old selfish ignorance that plagued my teenage years bearing my soul before God and begging for the strength it would take to get through the rest of my life as a mother.

my daughter arrived and suddenly everything i thought i knew about life, love, selflessness & family changed. i had a new respect, understanding, and also misunderstanding of not only my mother but all mothers. all my being could not contain the love & attachment i felt for this 7lb 2oz baby. i was suddenly complete, and i wasn't even aware that i had been lacking.

when my daughter was only three months old i started my own photography business, which i believe to be a majority of the reason i feel so fulfilled with my life as a stay at home mom.

i will be 23 on saturday. yes, that is a very young age in comparison to the average expected life span, but in my short twenty three years i feel that i have accomplished much.

there are many things that i've done that i would rather forget, but would never change. every moment & choice (good or bad) has lead me to the most prefect moment i'm living in now. all the dirty sins of my past have been covered in the blood of jesus and washed away, and still God has used all those things that He tried to protect me from to weave the beautiful life i have now. i'm amazed every day at where i'm at. if someone had come to me when i was 18 and said by the time you are 23 years old you will be the mother of two children, owner of a successful photography company & working on your fourth year of marriage i would have laughed at them; but now that i'm here in that place i am so grateful to God & my family (who may have lost hope for a while) for never giving up on me, and i would like to believe as i grow another year older saturday and we celebrate my life that they are all very proud of the woman, wife & mother i've become.


sugar & spice & everything nice

Pregnant women! They had that weird frisson, an aura of magic that combined awkwardly with an earthy sense of duty. Mundane, because they were nothing unique on the suburban streets; ethereal because their attention was ever somewhere else. Whatever you said was trivial. And they had that preciousness which they imposed wherever they went, compelling attention, constantly reminding you that they carried the future inside, its contours already drawn, but veiled, private, an inner secret.
-- Ruth Morgan

the baby is starting to move all the time! especially when i lay on my side. she hates it! i'm so excited about her arrival, even though it's months away still. i love this part of the pregnancy process. minus the fact that all i want to eat is sugar!!!!

i'm laying in my bed listening to the cars on the highway and the rain. my daughter is singing a song of her own composing and dancing around in circles. she is the light of my life, shining brighter every day. i know she is going to make the most amazing big sister. i told my husband i wanted to have two more girls, for a total of four and he said "i don't think so!" it would be hard work but so rewarding. if i knew the next time we would have twins i would so go for it! there was a mom of five in target yesterday and i marveled at how together she had it! i've always wanted a big family, but i never want to resent my children either and i worry if i have to many at some point down the road i will lose myself and be bitter.

this pregnancy is so different from round one! i think i'm able to appreciate it it more because i know whats coming down the line. all the love i'm going to feel when i get to hold her, and watch her grow into a bubbly little girl. i love being a mother so much i'm just ready to get past the tiredness!!! i think when the little one is about four i'll finally feel like to get exhale. only four years and three months to go!

i love my life


"you know your in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."
-dr.seuss

what happens in vegas, stays in vegas

we just returned home from sin city. that place is as depressing as it is fun!
things we did include:
dinner at midnight, more than once.
gambling.
went to hoover dam (leaning over the edge is freaky!!!).


















our first real las vegas show (it was called the jubilee, but we refer to it as the boobilee).


















visited the con expo.












ate in the eiffel tower. went to the top of the eiffel tower.










































visited new york city.
almost died in the cab ride from the airport.
almost died when the plane landed on the way home-scary!!!
saw almost all the casino/hotels.
rode a gondola around venice.

life with girls

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement,
job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.

NAME_____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________

HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA_____________

SOCIAL SECURITY #_________________ DRIVERS LICENSE #________________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES________________

HOME ADDRESS_______________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______

Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No
If No, explain: _____________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________

Number of years they have been married ______________________________

If less than your age, explain
____________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________


ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No

B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No

C. A waterbed? __Yes __No

D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No

E. A tattoo? __Yes __No

F. Do you have an earring, nose ring,
pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring? __Yes __No

(IF YOU ANSWERED 'YES' TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION
AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)


ESSAY SECTION:

In 50 words or less, what does 'LATE' mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does 'DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER' mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does 'ABSTINENCE' mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________


REFERENCES SECTION:

Church you attend ___________________________________________________

How often you attend ________________________________________________

When would be the best time to interview your:

father? _____________

mother? _____________

pastor? _____________


SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers
are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:

______________________________________________________________

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:

______________________________________________________________

C: A woman's place is in the:

_________________________________________________________

D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:

______________________________________________________________

E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? ___________________________

F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:

______________________________________________________________

F. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? __________________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO
THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT,
NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE
WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.


_________________________________________________________
Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)


_______________________________ ________________________________
Mother's Signature Father's Signature

_______________________________ ________________________________
Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman

Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual.
Please allow four to six years for processing.

You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. P leas e do not try to call or write (since
you probably can't, and it would cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be
notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases. (you might watch your back)

To prepare yourself, start studying Daddy's Rules for Dating.

Daddy's Rules for Dating
Your dad's rules for your boyfriend (or for you if you're a guy) :

Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them..

Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place t o your waist.

Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a 'Barrier method' of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five:
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is: 'early.'

Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge . Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual themes are to be avoided; movies which feature chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine:
Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi . When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

i love him despite himself

the other night my husband took me for ice cream and on the way there he played me this song and told me it was his song about me.


She keeps the secrets in her eyes
She wraps the truth inside her lies
Just when I can't take what she's done to me
She comes to me
And leads me back to paradise

She's so hard to hold
But I can't let go

I'm a house of cards in a hurricane
A reckless ride in the pouring rain
She cuts me and the pain is all I wanna feel
She danced away just like a child
She drives me crazy, drives me wild
But I'm helpless when she smiles

Maybe I'd fight it if I could
It hurts so bad, but feels so good
She opens up just like a rose to me
When she's close to me
Anything she asked me to, I would

It's out of control
But I can't let it go

I'm a house of cards in a hurricane
A reckless ride in the pouring rain
She cuts me and the pain is all I wanna feel
She danced away just like a child
She drives me crazy, drives me wild
But I'm helpless when she smiles

When she looks at me
I get so weak

a little bit about me

1. Do you own uggs?
no i do not.

2. How did you do on the last test you took?
i guess that would be in college and i made an a.

3. Who was the last person you hugged?
my daughter

4. What are you most looking forward to?
spending next week with jon, & then vegas.

5. Do you wear Hollister?
use to. i'm to fat now =) and i'm still really skinny!

6. What food makes you sick?
anything that smells really strong and i'm not craving it. welcome to pregnant life.

7. Do you get shy around the guy/girl you like?
we've been married for three years and he's seen my give birth, i think we're good.

8. Do you remember what you were like a year ago?
not pregnant, so really skinny.

9. Who was your last text from?
lynn

10. When was the last time you saw this person?
monday night

11. When was the last time you got butterflies?
when we had the ultrasound to find out what the baby was.

14. Do you have pictures of you with your friends?
definitely.

15. Where are you right now?
h.o.m.e

16. Do you give special ringtones to certain people?
umhum.

17. What's the weather like outside?
really cold. and windy.

18. What are you listening to?
the disney channel

19. What is your favorite holiday?
halloween

20. Where'd you get everything that you're wearing?
okay..
1. old navy flipflops.
2. pj pants from target
3. maternity undies from motherhood
4. ga t-shirt from goodwill
5. hoodie that says "kurt-nee"

21. Do you text with T9 or ABC?
T9

22. Have you memorized your social security number?
when i was in highschool i had to

23. Have you ever had a dream about people you love dying?
only once

24. Do you get along with you parents?
they are my best friends.

25. Do you like water?
love it

26. Do you have a pet in the room with you?
in the floor next to me

27. When is the next time you'll see the person you like?
tonight

28. If you died today, would there be anything you wish you could've said?
nope

29. Are you on YouTube?
i dont think so.

30. What was the last book you read?
all the way? i can't remember i'm reading pillars of the earth right now

31. Are your nails painted right now?
nope.

32. When is your birthday?
march

33.What would your parents do if they caught you drinking?
i'm almost 23 years old i drink in front of my parents all the time.

34. What was the last food you ate?
muffin.

35. What's the last food you ate that was salted?
mashpotatos.

36. What are you watching?
the computer screen

37. Do you talk to people on the phone or IM more?
phone.

38. What type of cell service do you have?
t-mobile

39. What color are your eyes?
hazel

40. Do you have your ears pierced?
yes. three times.

41. Would you ever pierce your own belly button?
no, i have people that do that for me.

42. Do you want any more piercings?
i want my lip on the side but my husband says thats trashy, but i can get a stud in the middle.

43. Have your friends seen you cry?
yes. and a few strangers!

44. Who was the last person you cried in front of?
my daughter. i cry at the publix commercials.

46. Are you annoyed with anyone right now? Who?
nope.

47. Have you ever had a panic attack?
nope

48. Name the last time you got really bored?
everyday

49. Who is the last person you talked with MySpace Messaging?
my cousin

be still and wait

i feel like i'm in a place of waiting.

waiting on rileigh mostly, and i would not rush this pregnancy for anything in the world because it's the last time i plan on being pregnant, and i'm just enjoying taylor-marie, but for the last few years i feel like something huge is just around the corner. it might be that i've always felt like we were incomplete because i knew we were going to have another baby and now that we are so close it's really exciting, but i know there is alot of hard work ahead and that makes me feel overwhelmed already!

it's amazing to think i will be 23 with two children. i realized this morning though that my children should not define who i am. they are a deep layer of me, but not solely me.

i also am so behind on my God relationship. i think that has a lot to do with this restlessness that is taking me over. it's just so hard to get into a good habit. bad ones seem to slip seamlessly into my life while the things i should do get pushed to the side. i just need some mental & physical energy!!!

i love george bush but...



i like the way this was done. i vote republican but i thought this was neat.

long but wonderful day

i am in the best mood ever because me & my best went to the huge kids consignment sale, and totally racked up!!! i only spend $140 but came home with well over $600 worth! i got the swing i wanted which at target is $130 but i only paid $50!!! and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it! i got taylor-marie some dr.seuss books-brand new $2 each!!! you can not beat that! the only down side to the day was the four hours we stood in line to check out!!! it was so nice though to buy taylor-marie some high end clothes-she got three baby gap outfits-and not go broke!!! i don't even go in baby gap because it is so high! rileigh also got a few outfits, a toy (which her big sister has claimed), and a crib bumper! my husband was not very impressed but i don't think he really gets it!

slow, slow, slow



my photography business (http://web.mac.com/courtneyrosen) has really slowed down to a small trickle. it was nice during the busy holidays and being sick with rileigh, but now i'm ready to be busy again!!! i went through some old sessions today and found some stuff that really made me miss working!!!

i really want to shoot taylor-marie but every time i take her outside and try she is totally not interested!!! it's so frustrating when it's your own child who won't do what you want! other people's kids are always so easy!

photo survey

1--Answer the questions below.
2--Take each answer and type it into Photobucket. (www.photobucket.com)
3--Take any picture from the first page of results and post. (click on the picture and copy the HTML code) Dont explain, it's funnier that way!


1. What is your first name?
(:

2. What month were you born in?
March

3. What's your favorite hobby?
photography

4. What's your favorite TV show?
House

5. What's your favorite color?
orange

6. Who's your celebrity crush?
angelina jolie

7. What's your favorite movie?
alot like love

8. Who's your favorite Disney character?
Meg

9. The name of your pet?
bebe

and

Tuesday

10. What's your favorite vacation spot?
beach

11. What's your favorite dessert?
Chocolate cheesecake

12. What's your favorite letter?
!

13. What are you most afraid of?
Photobucket

14. Your last name...
rosen

+

Photobucket


15. What's your favorite time of day?
Atlanta

16. What's your favorite accessory?
Cell phone

17. What's your favorite beverage?
lemons in water

18. One word to describe yourself...
pregnant

my first post!

i'm so excited to be blogging again. i haven't really blogged since college, and i have truly missed it. i plan on using it as my escape from the craziness that is my day! chasing a two year old while producing another one is hard work! as i type this i can barely keep my eyes open and it's only 8:54pm! i will begin for real tomorrow!